Dealing with a Marriage Gone Bad and Children
Life doesn’t always go as intended and we need to make challenging decisions at certain points. For example, while you’re doing everything in your power to make your marriage work, that is no guarantee it will. These things can be impossible to control. If your marriage has begun to cause you misery, then you have to take stock of it. To get a divorce or not is a big decision, especially with children in the picture. Before you actually decide, here are issues to take into account:
Talk to your spouse.
No matter how uncomfortable it may make you feel, talk to your spouse. Have an adult and civil conversation about your different options and how you can possibly improve your marriage.
Be honest first and foremost to yourself.
By being honest to yourself, you can ensure that the cause you are fighting for might actually work for you. Much of this depends on where your spouse half is coming from with his own thoughts and emotions. If you are on the same boat in terms of saving your marriage, then there’s a big chance you will.
It is highly advised that you continue trying and don’t give up unless you totally can’t swallow it anymore. Explore new ways to improve your marriage, such as seeking marriage therapy. You could unveil a deeply rooted issue and finally put it to rest. If you don’t talk about your feelings, there is no chance of repairing your marriage ever.
Make a decision and stand by it.
At a particular point, you will have to make that decision, whatever it is, and go with it. Ensure that you are completely comfortable with such a decision, and stick to your guns. Divorce is painful, but even more so is going back and forth with your spouse as your children are watching. It’s will be challenging, but if divorce appears to be the best decision, have the courage to stand by it.
Talk to the kids on their level.
Divorce can take a big toll on kids, especially if they are adjusting to other changes in their own lives too. The best thing to do is talk to them in a way they would understand. If you are thinking of sharing custody, establish a routine that brings the least disruption to them. In any case, make them understand that both of their parents love them, no matter what happens.
It’s rather heartbreaking to be experiencing a divorce or a troubled marriage, but you have to stay positive and focus on all the wonderful things you already have in your life. Look forward to the future and be careful not to lose yourself in the process; in the end, you will emerge a stronger and wiser version of yourself.